Saturnian Quarantine, times of change!

by with 3 Comments Astrological InsightsSearch for home

I’ve been back in the UK for the past 5 days and things here (regarding the corona virus) are more heated than it was in Brazil when I left (apparently the panic is beginning to catch up there too).

My friend has left to Brazil and I’ve decided to live in Brighton, a small town on the beach 50 minutes by train from London. Im currently staying at his bedroom until the girls in the bedroom next door (which is meant to be mine) are able to travel (they were planning to go to USA and Spain, both have their boarders shut at the moment).

In moments like this I think of what Liz Greene said about the outer planets talking about collective movements of change related to survival and how much we individuals have little to say regarding that. Some things are beyond our control and we would do good in keeping our peace and mental health in any way that works for us. Meditation, prayer, drawing, painting, dancing, jogging… you name it. Whatever works!

This is actually what I wanted to write about in here. We are in a situation where a quarantine is somehow ‘forced’ upon us, take that as an opportunity to go back to yourself. To reflect upon your life, your choices, your values and who you are in the most authentic way. Who are you? What do you truly need? How can you best contribute with the transformation that we (collectively) and the world seems to be going through?

Jupiter and Mars joining in the conjunction of Pluto and Saturn in Capricorn seems to be reflecting this ’emergency crisis’ in the forefront and I feel this to be symbolising what has been going on in the last few years, a big political and economic crisis. It seems like we are hitting a point where we cannot ignore what is going on anymore. The structures that organize our society are purging and in need for massive transformation.

How can we contribute in this process?

This is one of the questions that we could ask ourselves during the quarantine. What would we like to see more in the world? It’s another one.

By the end of the year Saturn and Jupiter will conjoin in Aquarius marking the beginning of a long cycle in the air element (it will be a change from earth to air) and a 20 year cycle focusing in the aquarian archetype.

Aquarius at best connects with humanitarianism, how individuals can best contribute with the group, progress in a digital sense and acceleration of time (more?). As Jessica Murray said, we will be moving from materialism to idealism.

How is the best way that we, as individuals, can take responsibility in this process?

I think that the answers to some of these big questions could come up as we take advantage of this quarantine to do some soul searching rather than wallow in fear and panic.

What kind of society would you like to see manifesting, starting from your neighbourhood?!

Reviewing rebirth

by with 3 Comments Astrology and meInner lifeProfessional Astrologer

Mercury is about to go retrograde in Aries tomorrow.

Spring has also arrived and Im allowing myself to take a break to review the (constant) changes happening in my life.

With the majority of planets in mutable signs in my chart, Im doing one of the things I do best, Im adapting.

My daily routine is already pretty organised, with meditation in the morning and yoga in the evenings, and my work as a chef in between.

I feel that feeding people does bring me some joy and contentment, perhaps the Moon in the 11th house could be related to that. But I still have my sense of call strongly connected with astrology work.

In the midst of changes, (moving houses and cities, getting a full time job after a long time working either part time or for myself only), I felt the urge to focus on my daily routines and spiritual practice to keep myself balanced (or perhaps not to loose my mind…).

I have managed well I think. But was wondering how long would I last working on something that isn’t my true passion.

Then, last Saturday Buddhafield festival in the city was on, and I went to read tarot, but it turned out that I had my laptop on me and Wifi available, so I could also offer astrology readings to people.

It went amazingly well and I was fully booked pretty much the whole time I was there.

Having half an hour slots turned out to be a stimulating and interesting challenge to me, for I still prefer offering an opportunity for depth and empowerment rather than a brief list of ego praising characteristics.

New ideas came up, skills and things, and as a result, a review on what I can offer to my clients.

I also see (again and again) how much my process of growth is tied together with how effective my work can be, there is no separation here.

This is a great reminder to let go and trust. To stop comparing myself to others. To realise (again and again, again) that we are all unique and so is our path.

No rules or racing, for success is to be peaceful, healthily centred and content.

I have been contacted by two different people yesterday offering me work, one of which is a talk about Tarot, Astrology and Archetypes (excitement) and the other a potential opportunity for writing to a new astrology website.

Mercury’s retrogradation in Aries is perhaps reflecting an opportunity for rethinking strategies and plans of action, let’s make the most of it.

Transiting Nodes

by with 5 Comments Random

Have you ever noticed what happened when transiting North node hit something on your chart?!

Transiting node now is just about to make a conjunction to my natal Sun, and regarding the frustrations I wrote about yesterday, I have a good feeling about it.

The lunar nodes are considered to have a connection with karmic lessons and spiritual growth, and I have been observing it’s reflection when it touched something important in my chart.

In my experience there is usually someone else involved.

When transiting North Node made a conjunction with my Ascendant, Moon and Venus (in different occasions) I met someone that somehow taught me a relevant lesson regarding the principle in question.

When the nodes transited my ASC-DSC axis I met the guy who I shortly after would have my Saturn return intense experience with. Encountering this person has taught me lessons in so many levels that it is still hard to pinpoint.

I also see the karmic intensity of it by the fact that transiting South Node was right on my DSC. (If there is such a thing as past lifes, I certainly have met him before)

The two other occasions were a little lighter.

With North node transiting my natal Moon I got reunited with my past lover, the one that had a very relevant role in me acting upon my decision to leave my life in London behind (culminated with the first square from Pluto to my Moon in early 2015).

Then when transiting North Node was conjuncting my natal Venus I met a very interesting (not in a romantic way) polish man in Thailand, that gave me many insights into my love life (not only) and who gave me a peculiar and intense healing session.

That was quite powerful and somehow prepared the ground for the  intense healing experience I’ve had during my yoga course.

Now transiting North Node is just about to hit my natal Sun, in a moment when I’ve been feeling deflated and longing for more opportunities to express my solar principle.

(I’ve been reading “The Luminaries” by Liz Greene and Howard Sasportas and getting a lot of inspiration from it, couldn’t recommend more! Do read it if you want to get a deeper understanding of the solar and lunar function in the and astrological chart.)

Will keep my eyes wide open now..

Updates of plutonian times..

by with 2 Comments Astrology and meInner lifeSearch for homeTrip

I’m hanging out at my friend’s kitchen now.

As usual he has woken me up at 7:30 am with his idiosyncratic routine. He is renting both of the bedrooms in the flat so we share the living room when I’m around.

I’m back in London again. I’m still traveling quite a bit even though I’m just getting more and more tired of it.

Last week I was at the forest of Dean which was lovely.

The man I’ve been seeing came to visit me and again we had an intense fight on the third day that we spent together. That’s also the third time this happens.

The Venus square Neptune part of my psyche really can’t seem to be able to discriminate and see this relationship clearly.

On one hand he challenges me a lot, which is great. I’ve never been with a guy who would confront me like he does. On another hand our encounters are becoming very stressful when we fight (even though we also share intense positive moments) and I can’t help but think that perhaps I would be better off on my own.

Since Pluto started transiting my natal Moon I’ve gone through so much strife and crisis. So much destruction has happened and now I just feel like rebuilding myself. Moving into my new home, focusing on saving up some money to buy myself a laptop again (pretty hard to keep writing on this small tablet.), sticking up to a good daily routine.. loving myself…

I’m also sure that he is a manifestation of this transit as I’ve met him when Pluto was retrograde making the third exact square to my moon in July.

Old manipulative tecniques, emotional blackmail, victimisation.. old unconscious patterns of relating in general don’t feature in my interaction with this man.

It doesn’t work. (Not that I consciously want them to work)

He always challenges and questions my communication a lot. He has Venus in Scorpio in the third house and is a lot more direct and talkative than most Scorpio in Venus men that I’ve been with in the past.

He is currently at a 10 day meditation retreat and we agreed not to talk to each other for those days.

Today I’m officially counting down the days to move in to my new bedroom in Bristol. 7 days to go. (And Pluto will be direct when that happens..)

Saturn is also making a trine to my MC and I’ve had a few unexpected requests for astrology work. That’s truly great because I’m not putting much of my energy into my passion at the moment (domestic issues are feeling more urgent with this Pluto/Moon stuff)  so I can only imagine how it will be when I do focus on my work.

Internally I already feel different though. More confidence is available as I’m stepping more and more into my inner authority without feeling scared.

Empowerment.

Also yesterday I did my first head stand.

I’ve been patiently and slowly working towards that since January. I wanted to do it with control and equilibrium rather than by throwing my legs against the wall.

Respect the timing..

(This also works as a symbolic reflection of all the work that I’ve been doing on myself with those multiple transits in the last few years..)

Travels of a progressed Moon in Sagittarius..

by with 5 Comments Astrology and meSearch for homeTrip

I feel a warmth in my heart. Excitement.

I’m all set to travel again, this time I’m heading to Taunton in Devon to work at another summer festival.

Since my progressed moon entered Sagittarius in February last year packing up has become a kind of routine. By now I think that I’ve developed the most effective way of packing everything I need in my backpack. It’s amazing!

And somehow being constantly on the road really feels like home to me! (I’m also a life path number 5 in numerology)

Anyways, this festival is meant to be a very especial one that I haven’t been to yet. It’s called Buddhafield  :), and as the name already says, it is a spiritual one. (without drugs or alcohol being sold)

By experience, it is great to be with a crowd that tries getting their kicks from spiritual work rather than drugs. (nothing against alternate states of consciousness induced by substances when not done on a daily basis)

While I’m there, in a week or so, Pluto is going to go down to 15 degrees again and make the third exact square to my moon.

I hope I have some kind of breakthrough hanging out there. Perhaps a feeling of being at home, even if temporary, leads me further in my path. (which is becoming more and more connected with spirituality)

Fingers crossed and a positive mindset.. ♡

Pluto transforming the Capricorn principle

by with One Comment Astrology and meInner lifeSearch for home

This is a long title for a post, but I couldn’t think of a better one.

I’ve had an important insight from the book I already mentioned that I’m reading now. (“Yoga and the quest for the true self”)

In one of the chapters the author, who is also a psychotherapist, stretches the equal importance of cultivating insight as well as equanimity in the process of becoming real. He called them the two pillars.

I’ve always had a strong introverted tendency. Even if sociable and very talkative at times I would always need lots of time on my own to recharge myself. To regain balance. To understand and to know myself more deeply.

With my strong Pluto/Scorpio plus Virgo nature, insight and analysis always had a very important place in my life.

Only now, after couple of years in this process of changing my lunar function (represented by the Pluto transit) I’m paying more attention to the equanimity principle.

Basically, a lot of insight without equanimity (the ability to hold and nurture ourselves, the ability to feel safe) we are under the risk of some serious fragmentation of the self. And I can’t help but hear the symbolism connected with the Moon/Cancer in the horoscope when I think about equanimity.

Since Pluto has been squaring my natal Moon I’ve been challenged to take care of myself in so many ways. I’ve been challenged to learn how to nurture myself instead of just projecting my sense of security and well being into someone else (I’m a libra moon!) or into material resources (Pluto is transiting my second house).

It’s been quite a ride, but since my encounter with yoga this process is becoming somehow easier. I am sinking more into my body, understanding more of it’s flow. I am learning that from one day to another I’m different and that’s just natural. In some days some postures are easier to perform than in another. We are not as fixed as we think of ourselves and there is nothing wrong with that.

I am learning to appreciate and accept myself more. I am learning to love my constant flow, just like a river.

And that’s where I thought about the title for this post. I believe that understanding that we are not robots and that efficiency is costing too much by removing us from our natural flow and our connection with the earth and the natural cycles. By removing us from our genuine connection with each other.

How can one be sympathetic when the lack of basic inner nurturance and equanimity is so strong?

Pluto in Capricorn is giving us the opportunity to transform and regain some balance, collectively as well as individually. The opportunity to balance the axis of Capricorn and Cancer in our lives, in our relationship with ourselves. To develop more equanimity is to become more gentle. And that makes me think of Che Guevara’s famous quote:

“Hay que endurecerse, pero sin perder la ternura jamas “

Reminder

by with No Comment Astrology and meInner lifeRandomSearch for home

Mostly I’m writing this post now as a reminder to myself.

I’m in Clapham Common having a coffee at the place I used to work before leaving everything behind. I actually just finished my second coffee. I really shouldn’t have done this as I’m now feeling a bit hyper. At the yoga school coffee is one of the things they tell you to quit.

I’m having my period in about a week, (I’ve been having my period around the full moon for quite a while), and feel strange. My PMS isn’t nearly as strong as it used to be before consistently practicing yoga like I’ve been doing everyday for the past 2 months and a half, but I can still feel it. The practice of yoga is not only decreasing my levels of PMS, but also providing me with detachment. That is truly great. Is like I can, instead of just becoming instantly possessed by it, stare at the more destructive parts of myself in the face.

Anyways, the more infantile part of me, the one that was desperately in love with that young man over a year ago, has been actively throwing emotions at me today. I’m still quite centered though. I’m not necessarily felling cheerful, but I’m peaceful.

This situation reminds me of the realisation I’ve had after coming back from Bristol last week.

The Pluto transit to my Moon is still an ongoing process, with the longest hit taking place pretty much during the whole second half of this year. I don’t like predictions and I strongly believe that thoughts create reality, but after I came back from Bristol I realised that my confusion and search for home is still going to linger on for a bit longer. The feeling of contentment and belonging that I’ve had during my last two weeks in Thailand whilst being super busy with astrology was just a taster. It was just a preview of, more or less, how my life can be once Im done with all of the detox and transformation expected from an intense plutonic time.

I feel that I really need to keep reminding myself of that in order to work constructively with whatever is being born within me. And the transit is perhaps only a reflection.

I like to think like that. I believe it to be more empowering and helpful in the cultivation of patience, a fundamental virtue in the process of maturation.

Energy work

by with No Comment Astrology and meInner life

My excitement needs a post to be registered.

Back in London again and had a pretty sound day today.

Later on, after almost 2 weeks that I’ve been back in the UK, I finally felt like contacting my ex lover. The one that played an important part in all of these changes that I’ve been making since last year. The one that was so hard to forget during this whole time of intense turbulence.

I guess I am very happy to have spoken to him just now. Happy to have shared a few of my thoughts and feelings about my life now.

But mostly I’m truly excited about putting in practice what I’ve learnt at the yoga course.

When I called him my heart was wildly pumping. It was amazing to see the effect that he still somehow has over me. There is this crazy amount of emotional intensity in this connection and that always felt quite uncomfortable to me, as well as somehow irresistible. Both my Pluto and Saturn are in Scorpio and as much as I praise and seek an intense emotional exchange and intimate connection with someone, I also dread that.

I could never ignore the fact that our composite Moon is tightly conjunct to Pluto.

There was, and it seems like there is still, a lot of powerful emotions being generated by our interaction. The difference now is knowing how to use that mainly as, quite literally, a generator. A generator of a kind of energy that can be harnessed for spiritual growth. Straight after my first attempt calling him and feeling those strong feelings I just did some of the yoga postures and breathing exercises for sublimation of energy. Basically I did the exercises that were designed to send the flow of energy from the lower chakras to the higher ones.

It worked pretty well I think.

When we actually spoke on the phone I was quite centered and did not lose the focus on myself. Amazing. This is precious knowledge for someone like me, someone that tend to feel things quite intensely. Especially when it comes to a love affair.

I think that finding ways to help reclaiming our power is crucial in the process of self realisation.

I feel content.

 

Out of sync

by with No Comment Astrology and meInner lifeSearch for homeTrip

I’ve been out of sync in the last month. Definitely too much going on around here and inside me.

Tomorrow I’m finally graduating from the first level yoga course that I’ve been doing since January here in Thailand. I was pretty busy with that and with the second exact hit of transiting Pluto square to my natal Moon also taking place in January.

The first one, in March 2015, was connected with me leaving my home in London and many realisations about my mother bringing a lot of old anger back to the surface. (Also with the break up of an important relationship)

The second one had me practicing yoga twice a day for six days a week and a physical breakdown for 5 days that they call “process of purification”. There is definitely something really powerful about yoga and practicing it with awareness. I got pretty sick for those 5 days and all that I wanted was, funny enough, my mother! For the first time in years I really wanted to be with her and truly missed her care and love. I can totally see the connection there, the healing taking place while a lot of toxic energy was making its way out of my body. We spoke on Skype, me and my mother, everyday during that week like we haven’t done it in a really long time.

I’m now feeling a lot better. My mind is much more clearer and lucid than when I arrived in the island. A lot less emotional clutter, even my body is lighter as I’ve lost some weight with the combination of yoga and the sickness.

I have no doubt that I’ve made the right decision about coming here to do this course during this Pluto transit. I highly recommend to everyone having a strong Pluto transit to go for some kind of powerful detox process, a course like this or some kind of retreat. Whatever catches your attention, go for it. You won’t regret. It really helps the purging process and makes you feel a lot lighter afterwards.

This transit still an ongoing process for me, with the last and longer hit on the second half of this year. I have no idea what’s going to happen. What I know is that I’ve quit smoking and feel much lighter at the moment. Almost like a little glimpse of what could be the feeling at the end of this whole process of death and rebirth. Its exciting as well as profound and demanding. What can make a great difference is the awareness that enable you to make wiser choices to facilitate the process of purification represented symbolically by Pluto. Resisting this process isn’t the best attitude and I believe it can only make things more painful. The amount of resistance equals the necessary violence applied to make a change..