Prognostication as New Lenses

One of the things that I find most interesting regarding prognostic techniques in astrology is to see them as an opportunity to experience your natal chart differently. To have a temporary experience of how different certain placements are from what you know (especially regarding progressions/solar arc directions).

For instance I have a tight natal square between Venus and Neptune (with Venus being the ruler of my 7th house) and this has been very obvious in my love life. All of the classic stuff that we usually link to that kind of aspect: evasion, confusion, being the saviour or saved by someone else… my sometimes (many times to be honest) lack of discrimination has consistently put me into trouble.

It is not a surprise then that having my progressed Venus exactly conjoined natal Saturn has somehow been feeling refreshing (a word that we hardly imagine paired up with Saturn’s symbolism). But that’s how it partly feels to me. Suddenly I am more sober, more serious and unwilling to delude myself.

I want to see who is truly in front of me rather than dream about it. As I get older I am increasingly tired of the Neptunian fog that comprised my love life and this progression seems to reflect that. This time is an opportunity to learn Saturn-Venus lessons (transiting Saturn is also trine my natal Venus!).

And I welcome that right now!

The other day I had a date with someone and it was brilliant not to do anything, it was great to just hold and give myself time to slowly meet someone else. I told him I want to be friends and make sure we do have anything before becoming physical. I’ve never really done that before. It was great!

Sure I do feel isolated and alone at times (all of the Saturn stuff), but it somehow feels good being able to be with myself. I don’t want any illusions anymore, I’d rather isolate myself instead and concentrate on important things, like my dissertation (which I just started the process) and my astrological practice.

So whenever you see something like that coming up (progressed Venus on your Saturn), this could be a great opportunity, an antidote to an old pattern represented by the natal astrological symbol, like my Venus-Neptune for example.

Venus-Neptune rant

After much tension for the last couple of weeks here I am to write another blog post. This one I think is more of a need for self expression than anything else.

I feel confused and not sure about how to proceed, where should I be or how should I deal with my situation now. My natal Venus Square Neptune has been transited by Pluto and Saturn for some time, with my progressed Venus just about to conjoin natal Saturn, and I do feel this is potentially a big time of learning. Learning about boundaries and self worth, learning about my self-delusion tendencies in love, etc. Learning to get hold of my longings and to not project into a potential partner.

But these days I met an ex lover and all of that knowing and self awareness sort of went down the drain. I’ve always made a point in meeting past lovers after sometime just to complete the process of getting over someone. Just to see how much that person does not have a hold on me anymore. Banishing someone I like from my life forever, has never been my way of dealing with a broken heart.

But what do we do when even after not seeing someone for 5 years you realise that you still have strong feelings for that person? How can that even be possible? I feel like I’ve had so many lives for the past five years, so much travelling, moving cities, jobs, doing a masters, different relationships, etc. So much has happened, so much growth. How is it possible to still have strong feelings for someone that I thought I left behind long ago?

He is one of the only people I’ve met that I felt completely comfortable sleeping beside me, I didn’t feel restless and could manage to go into deep sleep quite easily. Many of his personal planets fall into my 12th house and I have the feeling that that reflects an access that he has to my unconscious, which is quite nice for sleeping. I don’t know. It actually feels like he has free access to my soul, and that’s the trouble. How can you let go of a connection of this kind?

Although a lot of good things are happening in my life at the moment, I feel sad. I wonder what is the point of having such a strong and deep link with someone if you’re not able to pursue and explore it further. Grow together. Why? What is the point in learning about letting go of someone you like so much, knowing that they feel similarly towards you?

Not meant to be? What does that even mean? …

Use your imagination and go beyond!

Synastry is one of the astrological techniques that has deeply interested me from the very beginning of my journey with astrology.

Since a young age, maybe when I was 9 or 10 years old, as we didn’t have internet yet, I used to read those cheap astrological magazines available in Brazil on the basic sun sign romantic combination and felt like I was uncovering some secret truth that was kept away from the majority of people.

With that said, the mystery of chart combination and astrological compatibility still hasn’t ceased to amaze me!

The other day as I was dancing around the living room and having corporeal insights into the subject (sometimes that happens with me), when suddenly it became clear to me something that I had heard during one of John Green’s lectures about synastry and the importance of always considering each astrology chart individually before making any further assumption on compatibility.

I was thinking about two different people currently in my life and how each affect me in very distinct ways, which also brought me the thought that attraction can have many facets and be very individually experienced as well.

In all of the astrological cookbooks one of the most well-known interaspects indicating magnetic sexual attraction between two people is Venus from one person activating Mars of the other.

(Im sure that I have already written about this when a co-worker in the past had his Mars in a tight conjunction to my Venus and all that that reflected was that we could work really well together, but definitely not in a romantic way as I didn’t feel any sort of sexual attraction towards him)

Anyway, here is another opportunity for me to uncover what it seems to be one of the ‘absolute truths’ of the astrological cookbook literary world!

I have been seeing someone for a few weeks and things are developing quite nice and slowly (I currently have transiting Saturn forming a trine to my natal Venus and DSC).

One day we went out together and I met one of his friends which I felt a magnetic attraction towards almost immediately. The physical vibrations I was feeling when he sat at our table serving himself a glass of beer sort of reflected to me that that was reciprocal, I think.

It was weird and uncomfortable even to talk with each other at first and I was at times feeling paranoid that my behaviour was too obvious and revealing. I did not feel very good about the whole thing.

Days later, when I was dancing and having astrological insights, I had the thought that that guy’s Mars closely trining my natal Venus was actually activating my natal Venus square Neptune combo and it was pretty uncomfortable rather than a ‘wonderful magnetic physical smooth sexual chemistry’. I felt awkward (my Venus is also in Virgo!) and very inadequate a lot of the time when this person was around, whereas with the current guy I am going out with there is a very strong friendly energy and I feel that I can be myself much more freely.

There are many other details that I have analysed about both synastries and both people in question, for instance the guy Im going out with have done many years of therapy already, a fact I feel that is of paramount importance in how a person can express more consciously the energies reflected in the birth chart, but I am not going to go into it right now.

My point is that we have to always analyse the whole chart and the level of awareness of each person before making assumptions on how the relationship will evolve. And in my opinion, we can’t know that without listening to the person in question.

So, cookbooks yes, they are an important step in order to start understanding what the symbolism can mean. They are part of a fundamental stage in our development and gathering of basic knowledge. But don’t get stuck with them, use your imagination and go beyond!

Wishes for the coming new decade…

We are heading towards a new decade in couple of weeks and I thought that I should somehow honour that by writing something.

When I look back, from 2010 until now a lot of important things have happened in my life, first it was during this decade that I decided to take astrology and esoteric studies seriously and became a professional astrologer. What a journey this has been…

I also had my first conscious experience of multiple transits and the depth of transformation that this reflects, and feeling the intense pain that was brought up with it… and surviving it all, feeling stronger and renewed.

There was so much growth, sooo much!

What will this coming decade be about, I wonder?

I am currently having my Jupiter return, which is activating my natal Jupiter-Sun/Mercury trine and I have started experimenting with doing videos on social media. I’ve been doing stories on instagram, sharing some ideas and it’s been really enjoyable. After a long period of transformation with a lack of clarity regarding my identity and voice it seems like I am slowly stepping into another place, another phase is slowly dawning and I feel excited.

It seems like what I enjoy doing is to bring the academic discussion into a more popular format, when I did a video on the full moon it somehow didn’t resonate much with what I want to be doing. Im not entirely sure what will be, but that is how I feel for now.  I would like to focus on sharing some of the information I am coming across in the MA with other fellow astrologers and the general public. Bring in the deeper, bigger, questions so we can discuss the nature of our art and work.

I know that I can be inconsistent sometimes, so I will go with the flow and see what comes out of it without expectation. What is really important to me is the authenticity of it all. I don’t want to fake anything just to have more ‘followers’. It has to be real!

So cheers to this decade for teaching me so many difficult lessons, and welcome to the new! May the coming 10 years bring us much growth, understanding, healthier values (collectively speaking) and love.

Love al-ways!

 

Scorpio New Moon trick or treat!

Once more trying to keep up with information on lunations…

Truth is that because it’s so cyclical it somehow bores me to write about full moon-new moon stuff.

But never mind that, because I do understand the importance of cycles (I feel that a huge part of astrology’s benefit is enhancing awareness on life’s cycles!) and I also understand how much easier is for us, in general, to connect meaning with the lunar cycles rather than the other planetary ones.

So here it goes…

This month’s new moon (which happens in the early hours of the 28th of October) resonates a little with my restless tendencies of natal Uranus in the first house (hence the boredom I talked earlier…) as the sun and the moon in Scorpio will be forming an exact opposition with Uranus in Taurus.

As I stare into the astrological map of this new moon I realise how much Mars and Venus are prominent in each other’s rulership sign: Venus in Scorpio (the sign ruled by Mars) and Mars in Libra (the sign ruled by Venus).

Traditionally they both are in fall, which would be interpreted by some people as an unfavourable position. Venus, which talks about our values and capacity for sharing and loving would feel uncomfortable in suspicious and protective Scorpio. At the same time, Mars which is about how we fight for what we want is less direct in Libra, the sign associated with relationships and sharing.

The way I see this interesting mutual reception between these planets during the new moon, is reflecting a need to work creatively within our capacity to relate and relationships themselves.

An echo of this idea is the axis of Scorpio (Moon and Sun) and Taurus (Uranus) which talks about, amongst other things, intensity and attachment (either emotional or physical/material), and with Uranus making its presence in the mix, I feel that challenges on letting go will feature strongly here.

Possessiveness or impulsiveness on breaking loose from someone could be part of the drama during this month (lunation). The old conflict, which I have written about in here a few times, between freedom and commitment.

A few years ago, during a very challenging time in my Saturn Return (which by the way is in Scorpio!), I read the book ‘Eastern body, Western Mind’ by Anodea Judith and had a great insight into the theme I believe this new moon to be about. The author linked this split with the second chakra and she talked about how the soul needs commitment and the spirit needs space and freedom. According to her the secret is in balancing these two needs because if we identify with only one side then the other person naturally compensates by playing the opposite. So, the more I want someone to commit to me the more the other person craves his freedom.

During this new moon I have the feeling that it is a great time for setting intentions for healing and balancing our two needs, being conscious of them both and not fully projecting one side of it into our significant other in order to avoid extreme situations.

Transit after transit…

Mercury is retrograde at 13 degrees Sagittarius, very close to make a conjunction to my natal Uranus/Mars in the first house and a lot of the current theme for me has been connected with personal freedom and individuation.

I believe that Jupiter in the early degrees of Sagittarius is also echoing this message.

During this last period of Venus moving retrograde I have been questioning and feeling a strong urge to find more space within my relationship. (with the times when Venus opposed Uranus as a peak of realisation about this need)

Now what is strongly coming up to me is not only the need for personal freedom, but also lots of questions about our conditioning when it comes to relating with one another.

Last week we had a training course on life coaching and the group of people that came here for the training were amazing. I connected with many of them in such a beautiful way. The dynamic between the group reminded me of one of those conscious summer festivals that I used to go when Pluto was transiting my natal Moon.

It felt like home!

In the last night we did an angel walk together (basically walking in a corridor of people whispering beautiful messages into your ears) and had a very long group cuddle for at least an hour. My heart was so open and the love I felt was so strong that it felt like being high on drugs.

I was in such a powerful and beautiful state that even saying no and asserting myself became easy and loving as well. I felt empowered.

Since then, I’ve been thinking about the general conditioning of being supposed to love only one person, or being protective and caring only towards family members, etc. Why is that? Why can we not allow love to flow and increase itself by giving it freely?

Why are we not allowing love to ebb and flow organically?

I have read once that love is the only thing that does not work mathematically in the way we know, the more you give the more you have to give. You never run out of it. (talking about unconditional love here)

Then I thought that if my personal experience of transiting Pluto to my Moon is connected with my role in the collective change that we are going through, my new sense of security within is what will enable me to love more and to help breaking old patterns that do not foster growth in positive ways.

I would really like to find new ways of relating, with more authenticity and the willingness to be vulnerable and communicate openly.

Transforming forms..

If my writing is becoming somewhat repetitive I apologise.

But this Pluto transit is taking most of my attention and energy at the moment. I can’t really talk or think about anything else other than one of the many Pluto-Moon layers that one can feel being triggered right now..

Yes, finally I’ve got a home. (at least for now anyways)

In the past few days I’ve been indulging in spending time in my new bedroom, specially in bed. I’ve got the mattress from someone else and I’ve been working on putting my energy in it.

I’ve been working on concentrating my energy in this space.

Jolly good.

But yesterday we finally spoke, me and the guy I was seeing since July. He finished the retreat and told me he has signed up for long term service there.

He seems happier  and lighter than before and I’m glad about that.

But here comes the next Pluto square Moon event: he also told me that he somehow has lost interest in our relationship. He isn’t as attracted to me as he was before. Just like that.

Since the beginning of this relationship he was always saying how crazy about me he was. He was always all over me, doing things for me, giving me compliments, buying me things… saying that he was concerned that he liked me a lot more than I liked him.

I just wanted to go slow.

Knowing about the Pluto transit to my Moon I knew I couldn’t just allow him to take care of me like he wanted to. I had to keep some space. I had to do it on my own, moving cities and also getting acquainted with my new place. I didn’t want to rely on him too much.

I just knew I wasn’t supposed to.

Not when Pluto, transiting my second house of self reliability, was making the final (and longest) square to my natal Moon in Libra, changing patterns of co-dependency in relationships.

But yesterday was a bit shocking to hear, and to feel his coolness towards me. I was already contemplating the idea of being on my own so I could focus on myself, but witnessing how someone can flip and change in only a few days feels slightly scary to me.

I am not terrified like I was when my previous lover broke up with me when I was just about to move out from my house on my own (back on the first square from Pluto to my Moon in March 2015).

I am not scared in a survival kind of way. No.

I just feel a little scared with the possibility that love might never stay..