Jupiterianism and the academia.

This is a strong Jupiterian time for me.

Transiting Jupiter is making an exact conjunction to my ascendant, while transiting Saturn is conjunct my natal Jupiter.

Interestingly, my Solar Arc Venus has just moved into Scorpio and is forming a conjunction to my natal Pluto in the 12th house. I have been aware of this change for a long time and wondered what would that be reflecting in practical terms.

I thought maybe a crisis in my relationship, falling in love with someone else, an obsessive passion of some kind, perhaps my partner would fall in love with someone else.

It turns out, at least for now, that the obsession that Im getting myself into is actually researching the esoteric in the academia!

Jupiter in my chart rules the 2nd, 5th house and the South Node and I remember in 2009/2010, when transiting Pluto was conjunct my Jupiter, I had a sort of “awakening” regarding my interest in the occult.

I started researching it more deeply.

It was when I learned how to read tarot cards, when I got in touch with Jungian ideas for the first time, when I started understanding astrology with more depth.

Both Saturn and Pluto in Scorpio (the sign connected with the Occult) are placed in the 12th house in my chart and I think about Gaquelin’s connection of Saturn in the 12th with research (he says this placement is common in Scientists).

I have started a master degree in Cultural Astronomy and Astrology (slowly, as a part time Postgraduate certificate student first) and the amount of (academic) reading that I have done already is quite incredible.

Transiting Pluto, after the last hit to my natal Moon (which, by the way, rules the 9th house of higher education in my chart), made its way to my 3rd house (of reading, writing, ideas, etc) and it is going to be there for quite a while now. My progressed moon has moved into the 3rd also and transiting Saturn will move there sometime next year.

I can sense how much the intellectual stimulation, by exposing myself to academic work on the esoteric and the classics (Im currently reading Plato’s Timaeus for this week’s discussion in class), will have an impact on how I think and communicate, without even mentioning the impact on my work as an astrologer.

I know this journey is going to be really powerful and it is so exciting that a lot of the time I feel like screaming inside.

I think this is a good sign…

..”unconditional cosmic acceptance”..

I am preparing a little introductory talk that I will be giving tonight to the 24 Indian girls that are staying with us for 3 weeks. They are attending to a program on becoming “peace ambassadors” the we offer here where Im currently living and working.

While I was printing their charts I’ve noticed that more than half of the girls have either Moon in Scorpio or the Moon forming a major aspect to Pluto. Some of them that don’t, have either Pluto on the angles or other personal planets in Scorpio.

Im thinking that it is interesting to see such a plutonic signature in a group of young Indian women that are here to learn different skills to bring back to where they come from in order to promote positive change.

Interestingly, although I am off from work officially, today one of the trustees came for lunch and she was brought into my house by the founder of this organisation to have a quick look on something.  When she met me she was told that Im an astrologer and, as soon as she heard that, she placed the palm of her hand right up into my nose asking me what I see.

As I explained her I didn’t read palms she impatiently asked me what do I do then. When I mentioned astrology charts based on the date and time of birth she just quickly told me her birthday and the hour of her birth. I then went on explaining that I actually needed a computer program and it would take a little time for preparing the interpretation…

Out off politeness I wrote down her details and the two other women that showed up with her also wrote down their details on my book. The situation made me chuckle inside for a few different reasons, but the main one was the synchronicity between what happened today and all the questions I’ve been asking myself while reading “The Astrologer, the Counsellor and the Priest” written by Liz Greene (the one I mentioned on my last post).

In the beginning of this seminar she speaks about the archetypes that might be unconsciously played out by the astrologer and one of them is Prometheus and stealing fire from the gods. Liz says that like in the myth, we also have to be punished, and she believes that this might be in the root of many common struggles that astrologers usually have. The lack of material wealth, the underlying feeling of guilt that prevents us from charging a proper price for our work or to value our time, and the feeling of loneliness and separation from society. Most people don’t get what it is that we do!

The situation today was the manifestation of some of these symptoms, the women barging in and expecting me to just freely give my time, the palm thing, the lack of boundaries and respect for my professionalism?

Anyway I haven’t got much time left to finish this post so I would like to end with a quote from the same book I’ve been talking about.

Liz Greene is speaking about what we do as astrologers (definitely not necessarily the only definition, but interesting food for thought) :

“Much of what we do for the client has nothing to do with the specific configurations we are looking at, but rather, with the fact that the chart, and ultimately God or the gods through the patterns of the chart, affirm the right of that person to be what he or she is. In this sense the astrologer  acts as intermediary for the cosmos, affirming the individual’s identity regardless of parental expectations imposed on it. A chart reading can be a revelation of unconditional cosmic acceptance.”

 

Saturnian sobriety.

I am currently reading Liz Greene’s seminar entitled “The Astrologer, the Counsellor and the Priest” and, as Saturn stations to go direct in the early degrees of Capricorn, I feel very introspective and naturally reviewing my connection with astrology.

In this seminar, Liz Greene is presenting a few different archetypes and mythic themes that might be unconsciously played out by the astrologer (as well as the client), for example the solar deity Apollo and the idea of expanding consciousness and promoting individuality, or Chiron, the wounded healer, that needs to share his wounds with others so he doesn’t feel so alone.

I am simplifying things here for obvious reasons and I couldn’t recommend this book enough for the ones that consider themselves, or aspire to become, professional astrologers.

As much as I would like to support as many different views and ideas as possible, or at least respect every person’s ideas and views, I struggle a bit when it comes to astrology.

When I read the myriad of astrological updates online I usually get the impression that most people that write them down don’t seem to consider their own lens and how much it impacts the interpretation of the symbols. ( I tend to think that a lot of those are but a reflection of their inner life?)

I have a funny feeling when I read things like an astrological configuration of some kind has helped something to happen. Or that the moon moving into a new constellations should make you feel in a certain way. Or a planet moving forward again might cause specific symptoms in your life.

For some reason this kind of immediate interpretation unsettles me.

I somehow feel like I have left a phase of infatuation with astrology behind. I don’t necessarily want to talk about it all the time with just anyone like I used to in the beginning of my studies.

I am still an enthusiastic of the complex intricacies of what astrology reflects, but for some reason I now find tiring to preach about it to the general public.

Interestingly, this seems to be synchronistically reflected by Saturn moving forward again and harmoniously activating my Mercury.  I feel that my view of astrology is somehow becoming a bit more sober. I don’t think that astrology can change the world, and I don’t desperately ask people’s star signs or time of birth anymore. Neither I try defining Astrology as a science when a skeptical crosses my path.

I am somehow accepting the mysteries more willingly, and looking within before rushing into revealing the secrets of another’s soul in what perhaps could potentially be an unconscious attempt to validate myself and choice of interest.

Have you ever thought about what made you choose to pursue your career path? Have you also gone through a process of change in how you relate with the subject that you dedicate yourself to? Im sure the answer is yes.

Any astrologers out there that would like to share their perspective on it?

 

Saturn stabilising energy

I have been meaning to come back here for quite a while but just didn’t manage.

In the last month I’ve developed a taste for the magazine “Womankind” (amazingly beautiful and ad free, full of really interesting articles and interviews), continued reading books and worked on developing my new routine in the community Im living and working since February this year.

Since Pluto has made the last square to my natal Moon things seem to have settled within and without.

My boyfriend also got a job as a cook and has moved here with me since around March. We’ve met in July 2016, when Pluto was making the third or forth square to my Moon, and we have been developing what for me is the most authentic, challenging and rewarding partnership that I’ve ever had.

Since Pluto moved from the 2nd to the 3rd house in my chart issues connected with money and self sufficiency are slowly fading. I feel secure and quite solid materially speaking, which is a very different place to be compared to the last 6 years of insecurity and little money to spend.

I can buy things now. I can also invest money in education or travels if I wish to do so. (Jupiter is placed in the second house in my horoscope, can you tell?)

It is very interesting to observe how feelings and themes are constantly shifting in a synchronous dance with the cosmos.

Going from these long lasting years of emotional breakdown and a tragic, and intense, feeling of insecurity and death to regained confidence and solidity.

From transiting Pluto square natal Moon to transiting Saturn trine natal Mercury and Sun (with Uranus heading towards a trine to those natal planets as well).

I feel strong and capable. I also see recognition being bestowed upon myself in the community and at work. Me and my boyfriend have been offered a little wonderful house in the grounds where we work. We are finally going to have the chance to live on our own within the community.

And the house is amazing, with beautiful big windows facing the forest.

We move in less than a month.

Life has a funny way of developing if we dare allowing it enough space to do so.

Now in the last few days I’ve been contemplating applying for a master in cultural astronomy and astrology. I somehow feel that this could be a wonderful way of expressing these supportive and earthy transits that I am going through.

At my job I also have the opportunity for writing projects for training courses and I feel that this master course will perhaps be giving me much needed food for thought and inspiration.

I had my eye on this master degree for a while but was put off by my lack of stability and material security. How can I concentrate and write essays when Im not sure if I can pay the rent in the end of the month?

 

 

Reviewing rebirth

Mercury is about to go retrograde in Aries tomorrow.

Spring has also arrived and Im allowing myself to take a break to review the (constant) changes happening in my life.

With the majority of planets in mutable signs in my chart, Im doing one of the things I do best, Im adapting.

My daily routine is already pretty organised, with meditation in the morning and yoga in the evenings, and my work as a chef in between.

I feel that feeding people does bring me some joy and contentment, perhaps the Moon in the 11th house could be related to that. But I still have my sense of call strongly connected with astrology work.

In the midst of changes, (moving houses and cities, getting a full time job after a long time working either part time or for myself only), I felt the urge to focus on my daily routines and spiritual practice to keep myself balanced (or perhaps not to loose my mind…).

I have managed well I think. But was wondering how long would I last working on something that isn’t my true passion.

Then, last Saturday Buddhafield festival in the city was on, and I went to read tarot, but it turned out that I had my laptop on me and Wifi available, so I could also offer astrology readings to people.

It went amazingly well and I was fully booked pretty much the whole time I was there.

Having half an hour slots turned out to be a stimulating and interesting challenge to me, for I still prefer offering an opportunity for depth and empowerment rather than a brief list of ego praising characteristics.

New ideas came up, skills and things, and as a result, a review on what I can offer to my clients.

I also see (again and again) how much my process of growth is tied together with how effective my work can be, there is no separation here.

This is a great reminder to let go and trust. To stop comparing myself to others. To realise (again and again, again) that we are all unique and so is our path.

No rules or racing, for success is to be peaceful, healthily centred and content.

I have been contacted by two different people yesterday offering me work, one of which is a talk about Tarot, Astrology and Archetypes (excitement) and the other a potential opportunity for writing to a new astrology website.

Mercury’s retrogradation in Aries is perhaps reflecting an opportunity for rethinking strategies and plans of action, let’s make the most of it.

Shadow work cast the light

I have presented a talk about the shadow in the horoscope on the 21 of December. The theme was chosen in relation to the season, it just made sense to talk about the shadow on the darkest day of the year.

When I was back at home I did my own private Yule ritual to honor and welcome the Sun’s rebirth.

And that’s when I fully realised that for the past month, whilst preparing my presentation (this time I had a projector available to use), I was doing intense shadow work myself.

{It is amazing to see how we naturally start resonating with whatever subject we decide to put our minds into.}

The last month has been one of the quietest, with no other occasional work to do, and I felt thrown back at myself.

A lot of anxious feelings and many of my insecurities came out to stare me in the face.

It was interesting to be going through yet another layer in this process, which, even though very challenging, seems to be strongly offering me an opportunity to grow and find my sense of self and solidity within rather than without.

(I truly feel that Pluto in Capricorn transiting my second house, and aspecting my Moon from there, symbolises my search for a different, perhaps more authentic, sense of security…)

With Saturn moving into Capricorn in the winter solstice as well, I also had the realisation that my ambitions were somehow being tested and needing reassessment.

My natal Sun is in the 10th house and vocation does seem to be the arena where my light shines the brightest, but it must come from the heart, not from an ego seeking validation!

My spiritual values and integrity have also been challenged throughout this shadow work period. The choices that I have been making so far, based in what I believe rather than “social ideas of success”, versus the incredibly intense insecurity and fear of being “wiped out” and not surviving in this world.

The whole thing got me thinking about community living once more and with a strong urge to move closer to nature again.

Liz Greene said in one of her Pluto webinars that when you are going through a Pluto transit, all of the profound changes that you experience individually are part of your role in the collective changes that Pluto’s cycles are actually reflecting.

Our personal drama gives us the guts and impulses that later on will compound the social transformation.

We are talking about survival here.

And with Pluto in Capricorn (and Saturn as well) I really feel that our survival depends on changing many of the basic values that our society is built upon, and that Donald Trump seems to be the personification of it, in a rather exaggerated form.

I am talking about patriarchy here.

The lack of connection and devaluation of the feminine (objectification of women, lack of connection and caring for the environment, profit coming before wellbeing, etc) and a distorted manifestation of masculinity, if not changed, will destroy us.

All of these rather important questions are the foundation of my need for reassessing ambitions.

How do I want to develop my astrology business in this world? What kind of contribution can I truly make without changing my life style?  How can I put my skills into service without feeding the patriarchal structures in our society?

A little note on doing rather than being..

Again its been ages since I wrote something..

Winter is coming here in England and I feel the darkness more and more.

The urgency reflected by transiting Pluto square to my natal Moon seems to be slowly fading away and I am still trying to see clearly what is left within myself.

Perhaps the seasonal darkness can help me making sense of who I am now; but lately I have had people coming to visit and stay with me and its been difficult to spend quality time on my own.

My brother came to visit this weekend. He is gone now and I am feeling a little nostalgic and somewhat sad.

5 years without going back to Brasil or seeing my parents starts to weigh on me I think..

I have a few ideas for new talks and a short course on astrology that I want to put together for early next year, but the darkness and emotional digestive process that I am going through now seem to be holding me back a little.

Is funny how much we seem to have lost touch with the natural processes of gestation and death, with the natural cycles of life.. with the seasons..

Our conditionings, that are supported by technological discoveries (electricity for instance), tells us repeatedly that we should be productive at all times. It tells us that only summer is great, with its long days full of laughter and social times.

It tells us that only the fruit is great, and that we should be ripping them constantly. But what about the seeding? Or taking care of the soil? Those activities are not as glamorous in our society..

I am writing this post in an attempt to dialogue with the voice in my own head that keeps nagging me for not being productive enough.

The darkest time of the year is supposed to be the time to go inwards isn’t?! A time for recoiling and pondering everything that has happened so far and identifying where you’re at in the process of becoming..

This is the time for reassessment and hopefully deeper understanding… why so much pressure to be doing things all the time?!

 

Travels again..

I have been traveling for quite a bit this month.

Even though all that I can think of and feel truly excited about is dedicating myself to my work and career, I couldn’t refuse the opportunity to go away for a little.

Im in Barcelona visiting my brother. (And managing to work from here.)

I had one client two days ago and today have another one for an astrology reading.

The feeling of freedom is incredible when you work for yourself!

I also feel that the time is ripe for me as I witness many different opportunities opening up.

Transiting Jupiter is making its last conjunction to my natal Moon and at the same time my progressed Moon in Capricorn is approaching a conjunction to my natal Jupiter.

A double whammy that propelled me to take the opportunity and travel.

Buddhafield was also incredible. Once more (like in the previous year) I had a very powerful experience of healing and profound exchanges with people. (I also managed to do some work there!)

Different than last year though, Pluto’s square to my natal Moon wasn’t exact anymore (the transit is beginning to move away now, even if slowly..) and I could feel the difference internally (also externally with all the changes that have occurred in my life).

More solidity and sturdiness, less destruction and feeling the void within.

The void has actually somehow become the gravity centre that allows me to be present..

Pain(s) and beauty(s) of self-employment..

Im having a bit of an issue getting in touch with a client that still has to pay for my service and doesn’t get back to me.

And I wonder, has every astrologer/freelancer gone through something similar?! Do we have to ask for guarantees beforehand and mistrust people’s sense of integrity?

Maybe this person is very busy… with a very sick mother.. and/or the telephone sank in the toilet.. who knows?!

To be honest isn’t even the lack of payment that bothers me, but the potential lack of respect.

Anyways, apart from this situation, things are developing well for me.

I have recently set up another talk at the same spot here in Bristol and feel excited about it. The first one went pretty well and I felt so energised afterwards.. also with great feedback from people.

Public speaking seems to be a very strong part of my call and I am looking forward to doing more and more of it.

With my progressed Moon currently in Capricorn I am finding great pleasure in getting on with “To do” lists like never before.

More fun than dancing or having idle time… very appreciative of increasing productivity at the moment ..

A sense of calling..

I just felt the need to come here and write for a bit.

Is already 12:31 AM and Im having trouble sleeping.

Im not sure exactly what is going on but I definitely feel charged with an extra amount of energy which I need dispelling..

Today was sort of a day off that I have given myself (even though I have worked a little on my blog) but now I am rolling in bed from one side to another having astrological ideas and mini insights.

I am currently reading James Hillman’s “The soul’s code – In search of character and calling” and can’t stop thinking about the idea of having a “daimon”. The author is basically defending the hypotheses that we are all born with an intrinsic call, a soul or spirit guidance, to become something.

He calls this “the acorn theory”, “which proposes that each life is formed by a particular image, an image that is the essence of that life and calls it to a destiny, just as the mighty oak’s destiny is written in the tiny acorn”.

I am thinking about that in relation to astrology, in one sense about how astrology can be helpful in finding the thread of our “destiny” (what we were born to be according to the archetypes in our charts), but also in the context of my life and my own calling.

Yesterday’s talk was truly refreshing and inspiring.

It felt like I belonged there in that place of sharing insight/knowledge/stories. It was like actualising something strong and deeper, something somehow bigger than just a desire to be a teacher.

Im not sure if I can convey in words that certainty, that feeling of somehow being back home and revelling in my element.

It felt great though.

Now, at this peculiar “insomnian” sleepless moment to me, I can’t help but have ideas for the next talk that I want to do….!