Relational alchemy

I’m back in London now.

I did write a post on my way to Bangkok but for some reason it was lost and out of frustration I refused to write another one. That bit of the journey and it’s thoughts are gone. Never mind that.

So I’m back in London  now. England still does feel like home to me and, call me crazy, I do appreciate the English weather. And also its beautiful nature. I’m still not sure about where is home but somehow, as I expand, this question is getting less and less urgent. It sounds cliché, but I do feel the truth in the saying that home is where you put your heart into.

I feel peaceful.

The last square from Pluto to my moon was very powerful, as we would expect it to be, but the intense practice of yoga was fundamental to my new sense of inner peace and solidity right now. I’m so glad I took that step. So much purging has happened. I feel lighter and more solid at the same time.

I’m now at a friends house in South London and thinking about synastry. I have a few interesting interaspects with him and can’t help but observe how I feel them to manifest in our interaction.

“The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two substances: if there is any reaction both are transformed.” This is one of my favorite quotes by Carl Jung and it always makes me think about how synastry works.

In synastry I find that the tightest interaspect, as well as the double whammy ones, always feature really strongly. I’ve been observing the differences in how I feel around someone that has, for example,  Saturn conjunct my Mars with an orbit of 3 compared to someone else with the same interaspect but with an orbit of 0 degrees instead. The difference is astounding.

This observation makes me think that perhaps the tightest interaspects are a quick way to access the myth of the relationship. To sort of know what themes are going to be strongly invoked by each other and on each other at the same time. Then obviously we also have to analyse both natal charts individually, in order to have an idea of how that interaction has an impact and connects with the process of individuation of each person.

Our (me and my friend’s) synastry tightest interaspect is his Mars at 0 degrees Scorpio making a conjunction to my Pluto at 0 Scorpio. His Mars also falls into my 12th house and I’ve always noticed that somehow, without any rational or clear explanation, something in him irritates me in a strange way. Because of my astrology I was always aware that it’s something  more powerful and potentially “dangerous” than an irritation caused by a Moon square Moon. There is something deep in this irritation that I feel towards him. And now that I’ve been spending time at his place I can also feel our second tightest interaspect, his Moon/Jupiter conjunction in aquarious making an almost exact trine to my libra Moon. It really feels pleasant to share a home. It feels comfortable and easy on this level. But the Pluto Mars thing is always powerfully in the background and it makes me a bit cautious. It constantly feels like there is some imminent potential for destruction between us.

I have to confess that my Scorpio ascendant finds it exciting.

At the same time we also have a double whammy of Saturn conjunct each others South Node and I can’t help but think that we’ve known each other from before. Perhaps we fucked each other up in another lifetime? I’m not sure but I’m definitely paying attention in this life’s interaction ..

More on that another time.