Clarity takes its time..

Once more I’m back in London.

Just went to work at a festival near Brighton. The same one I’ve worked on my birthday last year, just before I left the country in search for myself.

Last year there was a full moon on the day of my birthday and Neptune was making its last exact opposition to my natal Sun. That was intense. Not a plutonic kind of intensity, but a neptunian one.

I was lost. I couldn’t see myself clearly. There was a terrible sense of longing for something that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. I was about to leave the country to one of my biggest adventures but somehow couldn’t feel excited. There was a strange sense of not seeing myself. The strangeness of not having form.

As a result I couldn’t socialise very much during the festival. I was in pain for most of the time. I felt hollow.

Now, after lots of transformation and growth in my travels, being at a festival felt like a different experience. I was there, more grounded in who I am becoming. I now have a sketch, the outline of a bigger me.

It felt great to have a sense of belonging. (The whole Pluto-moon thing going on for me). Amazing to be part of a community. (natal moon in the 11th house…)

I’m in some serious need for rest, so will leave to write about the synchronicities that happened there tomorrow.