Is now 3:15 in the morning in Thailand and I’m super jet legged and having troubles to sleep. Is also hot as hell and I guess I’m not used to these temperatures anymore. It doesn’t feel necessarily bad, is just weird. I’m trying to feel my way, sort of trying to recognise how my energy works here so I can consciously align myself.
When I woke up around 11pm thinking that it was the day after already I decided to go to the backyard of the hostel to get some fresh air. Tired and confused I noticed that an anxious feeling was growing inside my chest.
In the beginning of my travels I had a goal that was still much too far, or so it seemed. It was keeping me going, it was like the promised land or something like that. And so I caught myself feeling insecure now that I have almost arrived at my destination (I haven’t got to the island I wanna go to yet).
But then something happened, I saw this french guy curled up on his own with people talking to him and trying to help because he wasn’t feeling well. I think he had thrown up and stuff like that. Anyways, I felt compelled to do something to help him so I offered and gave him some Reiki.
At the end he was feeling much better and the situation, and I guess channeling Reiki as well, has also helped me to achieve yet another level of clarity about this trip and my path. My anxious feeling have dissolved into a certainty that this is the moment to take spirituality more seriously. Surrendering my ego to a much bigger process of becoming who I truly am is paramount now. Money, travel bureaucracy and etc are just details from now on. I have to keep reminding myself of that.
I think that this hot weather and the energies in this country are going to play a strong part in my alchemical process.
(And Pluto is approaching to make a second exact square to my natal moon in Libra! I really need to write a post only on this topic actually.) Next time.